The Wisdom to Know the Difference

The Wisdom to Know the Difference

I used to love the show Sister Wives. I did not agree with them regarding religion, nor the reasons that the chose a polygamist lifestyle. I did not relate to sharing a husband. I found the husband to be totally annoying. What I loved about it was the relationship between the women, and their personal relationship with themselves. They challenged themselves every day to be better, to work harder, to rise above jealousy and bitchiness and all the other attitude bullshit that women pull with each other. What I found most interesting is that the women in this relationship always talked about how the relationship challenged them to be better humans. I absolutely love that idea.

Can we, as humans, dealing with the minutia of life, be better? Can our minds evolve to accept that with which we are faced, and mitigate only that which we can control? Or, are we so busy, selfish, emotional, and chaotic that we will constantly be freaked out and drowning?

There have been quite a few major changes in my life over the previous 10 years: having children, left a couple of jobs, lost friends, made friends, forged new relationships, started new jobs. For a long time, I just survived, I did not thrive. I don’t think I stopped grinding long enough to sit back and look at my life, I did not try to be better, I just tried to control and manipulate my surroundings.

I’m not sure that I am a better person, but the daily task of navigating life which includes working long hours, relationships with kids, husband, step kids, and exes challenges me to be patient, and to only allow myself to worry about those things that I can control. I quite often say the serenity prayer to remind myself. Somehow it centers me. I am not religious, not sure how I feel about a God, but the serenity prayer does something to bring my brain back to Earth. I love my life, I am blessed to have the relationships for which I have worked hard.


Even my challenges are blessings.


  1. Tricia on April 9, 2016 at 11:47 pm

    Love this post, April. I was at The Ethical Society of STL last night listening to Krista Tippett speak. I think you would have loved it. Many similar ideas were discussed.

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